mental engineering
Dream-life Bullies
and Aspiring Quitters

by Olga Reinholdt
by Olga Reinholdt
Meditation Teacher and Author
"I quit my job, I'm a full-time life-coach now!"


Congratulations on the very stupid step in your life.

I know, quitting your job to pursue your passion sounds amazing, courageous, badass. People who are committed to their dreams and really want to serve others the best they can shouldn't have any doubt about quitting their "9 to 5" and jumping into the world of opportunities.

In the past decade "9 to 5" suddenly became a synonym of failure in life, something that you suffer if you can't find better things to do with yourself. Coaches, bloggers, freelancers and the like demonstrate dream-life through their social media accounts, and encourage those who are employed to "follow their dream and live their lives to the full"… meaning "quit your job". Dreamlife Bullies.

I hear it very often "I quit my job, I'm full-time life-coach now!!!!"

Am I supposed to be excited for you?
Do you have a full-time practice? (well, If you do I am excited for you)

Do you have enough clients to replace your income?

Do you at least know how to attract enough clients constantly?

Normally the answer is "I have a plan" and the plan is to figure it all out somehow. Once that damn job is out of the way, everything will become possible, right?

So eventually what was supposed to be a pursuit of passion becomes a pursuit of another payment, another client, another lead, another dollar. Suddenly your life depends on how many people you solicit each day.

You buy courses where they promise you fail-proof techniques of becoming a successful entrepreneur, and instead of serving people you learn how to manipulate people because your own bills are piling up.

Steve Chandler gave a great piece of advice in one of his books on developing coaching practice:

"If you need a client to pay your bills, you don't need a client, you need a job".

But you've just quit one!

One of the reasons for so many "get rich fast" and "sell to high-ticket clients even if nobody knows you" trainings popping up nowadays, is that so many people fell into the brain-washing machine and quit their jobs prematurely.

But even this not the biggest reason to not quit your job. If you're smart, if you're really committed to the profession you've chosen, and if you find the right people to help you and support you, you'll figure it out.

I did. When I started my full-time coaching practice in the USA I didn't quit my job — I didn't have one.

I'd just moved from provincial Kazakhstan to Alexandria, VA, with 500$ of "savings", a young child, a supportive husband who was just starting a new career, a huge desire to continue doing meaningful work, and $16 000 worth of tuition for coaching training. I became full time coach without a full time practice or a reliable money-cushion, and I did figure it out. Money is figureoutable.

My "secret" (it's no secret…) to filling up my full-time practice from scratch was that I didn't quit anything before I started this one — I allowed the full experience to happen, and learned my lessons from it. These lessons became the foundation of my coaching practice, which indeed became a new chapter of life not only superficially.

The problem with quitting a job is that you run away from something you don't like: your boss, your responsibilities, your surrounding… Life's a hilarious thing though, and the more I watch aspired job-quitters, the more I see the pattern. Whatever it is that pushes a person to quit the job, he or she brings it into their "new" self-employed life.

If they ran away from being dependant on a company, they now become dependant on another formal establishment in their field.

If they ran away from hierarchy and inequality, they now work their asses off to get another certification, credentials and a namesake.

If they ran away from having to sell the company's product to others… well, guess what, they become pushy tired salesmen for their own service.

If they ran away from a strict schedule, they now complain that work never ends, and that they have to wake up early.

The point is — we create our own reality.

If we suffer something at work, we created it in our mind, and conditions fell together accordingly. Yes, you can have an objectively shitty boss, but it's your victimized thinking that created this condition and put you in it. Walk away from this boss, and you will find objectively shitty customers and shitty clients, that will take you back to the same experience you've had with that boss.

There's a meaning to it. Call it Karma, call it great sense of humour of the ultimate creator, whoever and whatever it is.

Every experience you encounter was given to you, so you can clear your mind from the delusioned states and believes, that impede your self-realization. Nobody can really find freedom from the problem within themselves, until they suffer what this problem creates externally.

So you hate your cubicle? Here, you have an external clue to what is fogging your mind, what governs your life without you even knowing, what creates delusions of who you really are. Escape that cubicle — and your delusions become even stronger.

Take this experience as a meaningful part of your life, use it to look within, live through it as you live through a challenging fitness class, allow it to accelerate the shift in you. And you won't need to quit — the path to your true expression will find you.

I have countless clients who come to me with this request: help me quit the job I don't like, and start my own thing. Aspiring Quitters.

I apply my philosophy to 100% of them, and those who take it, first create peace with their jobs and everything that happens there. Then suddenly things happen for them: they are offered a job that perfectly reflects what they wanted from their own business, or their company suddenly closes, and they get compensation for another six months, or their side gig takes off, naturally offering replacement income before they make it a full-time thing.

These are things that you can't force on life — these are things that life offers to you if you are not picky about your experiences, if you don't just quit what you don't like, rather choose to live to the full, and grow through it from within. This is what "living to the full" actually means, it's not taking pictures of your MacBook in a coffee shop for your Instagram account…

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